Things I Don't Want to Hear Today

It's been 20 months. Some days it feels like 20 years. But the presidential election cycle as we know it will come to a close today. It's been as intense as it has been inane. As inspiring as it has been idiotic. We've seen accusations, lies, distortions, and smears like we've never seen before. Obama has become too black and too white before our very own eyes. In these same 20 months, McCain has miraculously been a maverick and a Bush stalwart at the same time. Palin has been a boost and a burden. Biden has been an asset and a liablity.

We've heard about Bittergate, Palin's clothes, "that one," McCain's cries for a football-like season of townhalls, SNLs resurgence to the American consciousness, Bill Ayers, 3am phone calls, terrorist fist jabs, and the importance of flag pins.

All of these things have brought to the fore of American's consciousness things that many Americans would rather not face the reality of: sexism, overt racism, covert racism, ageism, prevalent segregation, black liberation theology, ignorance, fear, white privilege, and double standards. For most Americans, unfortunately, these issues will just be written off as the craziness of election cycles. For others, though, who feel these issues every day, they'll go back to trying to live life in the face of these realities. But for a while, though, we were talking about these things at our dinner tables. We were talking about them in our classrooms. With our friends. With our loved ones. And that, I think, is one of the best things about election season.

So with all of that being said in the last twenty months, here are some things I hope I don't hear today:

(10) Sean Hannity's voice.

(9) Any commentator or pundit make a distinction between "working class Americans" and "African Americans" as if the two are mutually exclusive.

(8) Talk about how people weren't allowed to vote because of problems at the polls. (Seriously, how hard is it to fix this? Didn't we experience this four years ago?)

(7) That John King is having technical difficulties with his magic map.

(6) Any talk about "Reagan Democrats." Seriously. There's no such thing. It's something drummed up by the GOP that everyone has bought into. What the hell is a Reagan Democrat? I'd rather have 10 magical unicorns.

(5) "This might not be resolved until tomorrow morning when most Americans are at work."

(4) "This might not get resolved until it hits the courts."

(3) Reports of how people got tired of standing in line for hours to vote and just left.

(2) That Wolf Blitzer is tired. I want a good 7 hours of straight Wolf Blitzer tomorrow night. No breaks.

(1) That John McCain, and Sarah Palin, are your new president and vice president respectively.